Seeking Your Advice

As the Query Trenches Get Deeper

Dear Friends,

As some of you know, I just came back from a vacation in Arizona, which was lovely. I posted about the end of it here.

And after such a nice vacation, I came back thinking I was ready to return to my desk. Back to writing! Hooray!

But then…I wasn’t ready.

At least not when it came to working on my novel.

Now, it could be that I just need a little more time to settle in, but I started thinking again this week about my querying process, and damn, folks, it’s brutal.

If you’ve been reading this newsletter, you know that I’ve been looking for representation for a novel I’ve written that I loosely call a GenX rom-com. I began the journey with this particular novel back in 2018, and I’ve revised it and put it away quite a few times. I’ve gotten plenty of rejections on it over the years, as I’ve written about here and here.

But as I’ve started querying again on the latest iteration of the book, I’m not sure if anything has changed in terms of my odds in traditional publishing.

After all of my revisions, all of my fits and starts with querying, I still might not make it to the ultimate finish line.

And I’m starting to feel that very familiar sensation of disappointment welling up. It’s a lesser form of PTSD—Post-Traumatic Submission Disorder— a common anxiety for writers who have tried a few times to secure literary representation, only to face close calls but ultimately, a lot of rejection.

Of course, I’ve known about the long odds from the start of this process. I’ve struck out twice before with traditional publishing—two agents, two books, one of which died on submission. And as I’ve said before, this isn’t a tragedy. Life brings us all a lot worse than writing woes.

But believing as I do in the power of threes, querying my third novel has led me to ask myself the hard question: What will be my next move if this book, like my previous two, doesn’t fly?

It sure feels like it’s three strikes and I’m out. Meaning, I’m actually done, as in, this steak is so well-cooked it’s now a hockey puck and I have to take it off the grill and chuck it because it’s totally inedible.

This might be the third book that gets buried in a drawer.

Anyway, this made me think about a different journey altogether—my second-to-last hike in Arizona. On that beautiful walk, I tripped over a root that I totally missed sticking up in the trail. Here’s a picture of it, snapped for posterity!

And then, there was a rattlesnake. Thankfully, some hikers saw it and issued a warning to be careful. I saw a picture of it and that thing was like, four-feet long! I was already dizzy from the fall, but a f**king RATTLESNAKE??!

So here’s the point. (You knew I’d get there, right?) After feeling mildly concussed and having the near-miss with the progeny from the Garden of Eden, I thought to myself, Even though this was a beautiful hike, would I ever want to take it again given the disaster-potential?

The answer was pretty clear: Not really.

So why, I asked myself, if I would avoid a literal hike given the possibility for catastrophe, would I continue ambling along on the similarly treacherous path toward traditional publishing?

Because for all of the excitement over the years that has come from writing my books, I’m left with some baggage—sort of like snakes and ringing my own bell— which frankly many rational people would leave on the tarmac at Phoenix Sky Harbor International Airport.

So all of this — my bizarro hike and the very quiet writing week— has me stewing.

Is it time to start exploring different paths to publishing? And if I’m supposed to take a different path, what should it be?

Self-publishing certainly comes up a lot as an answer to the question. I’ve wanted to avoid self-publishing for all kinds of reasons, including that it’s a lot of work and costs a small fortune. Plus, I fear I’ll be terrible at it. How in the world would I do the marketing??

People, I lost two subscribers this week and all I did was return from vacation. Are these folks bummed that I took a break or bummed that I came back??

So self-publishing is daunting.

Of course, I could also try publishing serially here on Substack to see if people might be interested before I make any decisions. My subscriber and friend Yuni Jung is posting episodes of her memoir, and it’s a-m-a-z-i-n-g. You should all check it out if you haven’t read it yet!

But I’m not confident people will actually read my work. Again, I’m not exactly tearing it up with the PR here. And if people don’t read it, would that be worse than putting it in the drawer?

I don’t know.

Now, I’m querying slowly, and I still have dozens of agents to approach on my list. I haven’t reached the point yet where I have to decide whether to change course or bury the manuscript in my overflowing desk drawer. Still, this feels like a good time to ask you, dear readers, about your thoughts — before I need to make any decisions. (It’s like writing your will before you’re on your death bed. Just good estate planning.) You are a wise bunch, and maybe some of you have been through this before or have insights to share. What do you think about self-publishing or serially publishing here on Substack?

What are your experiences?

Or, even if you haven’t written books, you might have thoughts about when to take a chance by changing course, or when to stop doing something that doesn’t give you enough return on the investment and even causes a lot of misery at times. Dizziness, snakes and all that. What questions do you ask yourself?

So, you see, I really do mean it! I’m hoping you can offer some words of wisdom. And best of all, if you tell me your thoughts, you’d be sharing them with my community, which is honestly so great, I’ve wondered if I should throw a Substack party so we can all can meet each other!

Maybe at some point. We’d make it a virtual gathering just to take your safety into account. Not sure I could be trusted in a garden or around a grill.

In the meantime, I’ll ask you again to please leave me any advice in the comment section! Leave it for others who might stop by! And comment on each other’s comments. I really mean for this to be a conversation, even if it’s just between a few of us.

Thank you friends! You’re the best.

Oh yeah, and watch your step out there!

xo,

Diane